these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
