literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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