brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
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