Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
