Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Randomize
