I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Randomize