How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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