it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
Randomize
