Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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