You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
Randomize
