I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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