did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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