he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
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