We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Randomize
