im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
You called me at 2am singing 'happy birthday' while screaming 'I fucking love you' verses, all while eating a burrito and taking a piss off your apartment balcony
Yeah I know, the people below me already told me
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
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