Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
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