I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Randomize
