people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
20 People Who Caught Their Significant Others Cheating and Hand Over Some Major Karma
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
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the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.