Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Randomize
