So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
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