it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
