I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
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