there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
why do cheetos always look like penises
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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