I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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