The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
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