Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
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