I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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