i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize
