Just cropdusted the office
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
we're so committed to being not committed
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize