Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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