This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize
