My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Randomize