someone took a shit in my car last night and left $5 on the seat...
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
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