I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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