New low: just hacked my moms facebook
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
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