In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
Randomize
