dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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