my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Randomize