I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
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So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
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Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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