He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize