Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
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my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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