a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
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