just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Randomize
