oh god the rape fog is back!
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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