I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
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