i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
