we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Randomize
