3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
my phone needs a breathalizer
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize
