i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
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