When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Randomize
