At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
