So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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